Tag Archives: encouragement

love transended…

As we know I am often inspired by song lyrics and the last few days of work last week and then today I have been driving along and then a song comes on that I naturally blast and then the lyrics literally transcend me to a place of clearer thinking… maybe that’s a good thing because one of my dear friends thinks I have road rage so maybe it’s the worlds way of saying sit back and enjoy the journey home by thinking about the song lyrics… well today it is..

Unconditionally by Katy Perry….
The lyrics…

“Oh no, did I get too close?
Oh, did I almost see
What’s really on the inside?
All your insecurities
All the dirty laundry
Never made me blink one time

Unconditional, unconditionally
I will love you unconditionally
There is no fear now
Let go and just be free
I will love you unconditionally

So come just as you are to me
Don’t need apologies
Know that you are all worthy
I’ll take your bad days with your good
Walk through the storm I would
I do it all because I love you
I love you l love you

So open up your heart and just let it begin
Open up your heart and just let it begin
Open up your heart and just let it begin
Open up your heart

Acceptance is the key to be
To be truly free
Will you do the same for me?”

This kind of love exists…. I know it does…How do I know? Because I have felt it…I felt it when I met them… I still feel it has possibly transcended on many different levels and at different times. Many of them probably don’t even know that I have felt this kind of love for them. But it doesn’t matter I have the joy of having felt and still feel it for those people. To truly love someone unconditionally means that regardless of what is happening, has happened or will have happen you love them. It is the greatest feeling in the world. I truly cherish that love… I think sometimes it’s the quite love almost a secret kind of love that means the most because people are afraid to get that close, afraid of the fear alone, but to understand someone and know them is to love them beyond reproach.

I have been told on numerous occasions that I trust to easily, fall to hard, love to often and am naive. But to those same people I would say I trust until they give me a reason not to, I fall just as hard as the other person can catch me, I love often because everyone needs to feel the love in acceptance and just knowing that they are great the way they are, and well by being too naive I rather be too naive then be so hard and rigid that I am miserable. So I am going to continue to love… will continue to love unconditionally because…..
I will love you unconditionally
There is no fear now
Let go and just be free
I will love you unconditionally

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Simple Things…Post 29

Today was one of those days… I didn’t sleep well at all..My puppy Maxwell wanted to get up way to early…and then I was really sore from working out a lot lately… so i just really wanted to lay around all day but I told myself KATIE get out of bed and start your day! And that my friends is exactly what I did!!! I went to the gym and had a fabulous workout..it was arms day, my poor arms… Then ran a few errands. When I got home I decided I was going to fix my mirror wall in my bedroom and re-figure that out and then I thought while i am working I will move my fish tank into my bedroom! Which meant I had to completely empty it out, the fish were not happy about that but now they have a very clean tank!!! There is just something about the humming noise of a fish tank that is so relaxing to me! So while doing all of these tasks today I just kept thinking to myself of all the simple things in life that bring me so much happiness, the simple pleasures!! Life gets tiring or to hectic or just stressful.. its hard to see the simple things that make you happy…but I am choosing to see those things, to acknowledge them and enjoy them more! 🙂

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Perfect Stranger… Post 19

So I have been wanting to write this for a long time but every time I sat down to write it the words I wrote started to sound dumb which is obviously not how I wanted it to sound like or ever write but I am not sure how else to begin so I am just going to start from my heart and that’s how it will sound the best…

I have come across some people the last years that have challenged me by making me be better and making me see things just a lil bit differently then my eyes could ever have focused on.
I wasn’t expecting them..
I wasn’t looking for them..
Yet somehow even in my blinded times there they were..

People that shared a glance,
shared an exchange of smiles,
then shared spoken words..

Looking back I didn’t expect my life to be changed but it has and I wouldn’t have had it any other way…
so thank you to those perfect strangers!!

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Recipe for perfection…Day 10

So there was ZERO time for blogging yesterday!!!!
The recipe for a steller day followed by a top night would include the following in no particular order…
Dr. Pepper
Sand
Olivia Newton-John
Goggles
True friends
Bows
Anything Paula Dean
Karaoke
Great legs
Hair dye and lots of it
Rangers
the laughing of little kids
The love felt between a family
Cameras
Memories
Football
Gifts
Facebook
Something old, new, borrowed, and blue
Weather man
Tranny
iPhone apps
Ice
John Travolta
Adult beverages
BACON
Barking
Gossip
Decoration chatter
Lack of sleep
Miranda
Erik
Katie
Purple
Black
Grease
…..That is how perfection is made!!!!!!!

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bravery

bravery….
by Katie
September 27, 2007
At what point do you say something is not worth it, is it when things become to hard? Or when things become outta your reach? Or better yet when you see someone else slowly walk away with who you wanted? How about when you have tried for something for so long and doesn’t seem like you will ever achieve it? Or when the path becomes so dark that you realize you are the only person still on that journey and everyone has left you? Or when you are told things will never change and you will deal with it forever, and ever, ever? Do you give up, do you just say nope I am done, do you say there is better things out there, do you say he will come back, do you say I will become healthy one day, or do you just stop and wait…. .
Fate is perfect…
Good things come to those who wait…
This too shall pass…
If he loves you he will never leave you….
Happiness is in the eye of the beholder…
You can close your eyes to things that you don’t want to see,
but you can’t closer your heart to the things you don’t want to feel…
But at what point do you decide to take on a characteristic which sets you above the norm, to posses this confident fortitude that passes most souls, to exhibit a great amount of courage, having the ability to face anything without fail or flinch, to have a bold presence which is resounding within your heart and mind…
To talk that extra minute, when you wanna run away…
To believe in someone beyond what you thought was ever right…
To give everyone a second, third and even a fourth chance…
To deal with a struggle,
that you know you might have for the rest of your life…
To know that you might see him someday,
and have to say I am glad you are happy…
To be positive when,
all you wanna do is shut the door, turn the music up and cry…
To do all of these things is to be called brave… Bravery is not something everyone has but rather it’s created and nurtured within the heart and souls of the few….
….You decide

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Coldest Winter

Coldest Winter….
By Katie, March 25, 2009
Think of a memory that makes you feel loved, soothed, cared for, where is that memory? What time of year was it? Were you single, did you have a significant other? Does the love for a person change depending on the season? Say for instance it’s the summer time and everyone is on vacation and you are separated from you significant other, do you think about them as often? Do you think about what they are doing, what they had for breakfast, if they have seen the movie that just came out? Now imagine that same person in the winter time, do you think about them more often then you did in the summer? Do you wish they were closer to you, maybe to keep you warm, wondering what they are doing all the time, thinking man, I wish I could share this hot chocolate with them…I have been listening to a song that was just been cutting me to the core this week by Kanye West, yea I am sure you are saying Katie be for real yea right but seriously this song, Coldest Winter, is just making me think so much about when memories are made. When are they most strong with people. I tend to think that more memories are made more often in the winter. I think this is cuz the winter time is when you are lonelier; you want to be close to someone, want to share the holidays with them. But does that same cold weather when it changes to spring time, do those memories get melted away with the temperature? Do they change? Do they just “melt away all our mistakes”? How about the seasons do you think that they are actual seasons or can a season represent something else like; distance or a forbidden love!? I tend to think that your feelings thus your memories can also change depending on what time in your life it is? How strong are those seasons of your life… how strong is that “coldest winter?” Do the seasons bring back the love or do the memories bring back the love…

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good news…No, GREAT NEWS!!!

I have been procrastinating in posting an update about me and my lovely hips. Honestly it a has been for a few different reasons that at the time sounded for real but now kinda sounds dumb but if you know me I can rationalize anything!! Haha anyways..My other fear is that I will somehow lose all of the progress I have made a be in a so much pain I would regret even mentioning my position or progress. But Katie doesn’t do fear when it comes to my hips. I have been taught thru the years that being cautiously optimistic will make life worth living!!! It has shown me that life is scary, choices are made, outcomes of the unknown, people lost along the way, dreams felt diminished but still..still I push forward.
I met with my doctor yesterday and I was so pumped cuz I was walking in on my own two legs without any aluminum parts assisting me!! I was able to tell him I am almost off all my medication which at on point was over 16 prescription pills in a day. Which looking back is just crazy but it is what I had to do at the time to continue the journey! So back to the doctor, he walked in and asked where are your crutches ? To that question I said the most beautiful five words that have ever come out of my mouth… I said “I don’t need them anymore” I had that feeling in my tummy like when you remember a fond memory, or the feeling people might feel when they realize they just won the lottery. Today I won the lottery. I know what it feels like to leave a doctor’s appointment and want to go hide under a rock because the outlook looks so grim that nothing would make me want to be anyplace else besides by the rock. But today I don’t need the rock, I can smile, my heart can smile.
Back to the doc appt, my doctor was commenting on my progress and said that “I” did all of the work. He said all he did was flip around our views at the time and how I have gained miles and miles of distance from those days. And how for once I was able to try a different method besides surgery and for the first time in a very long time it has worked. I will be the first to admit I do not accept compliments very well AT ALL. I usually end up brushing it off or return a compliment, but today and right now I am trying to take it all in about my journey with these hips. People always refer to me as being strong, courageous, or someone who refuses to give up. For some reason I never believed it. But something clicked in the docs office today when he looked me in the eyes and said you have done the work. Even when it was so very hard and my entire body was yelling at me and starting to shut down there was something in me wanting to say no, and with that no I was able to push back even harder against those two letters… n…o..!
So my encouraging thoughts that I used to tell, well I still tell myself are to live everyday to the fullest and that’s for real! Life can change at the blink of an eye life is hard and can be scary but you have what it takes! And I like to think of myself as a prime example. I have not walked in almost 5 years and within a little less than a year I have pun in the time, effort, and tenacity to get better. As of my most recent physical therapy session I walked for 45 min on the alter G treadmill with a 2% incline, with 95% of my body weight, followed by my other therapy appt for an hour and half of abs, back, leg rehab with treadmill work, weight training, proprioception and just starting more sport specific drills. I have never been so tired and covered in sweat and wanting a full body ice bath but STILL loving every minute of it! I have been extremely diligent with weight watchers and counting my points daily and weekly and if I can steal a saying from Jennifer Hudson, “weight watchers because it works”! Since the end of March I have lost 19.3lbs and I plan for that number to continue to keep going up so my weight can keep going down!
So next time when you feel like you can’t do it or just want to say no, think of me and with a huge enthusiastic tone say YES! And then if you need a pep talk call me and I will have one ready just for you!!!! Lastly, I would like to say the biggest thank you and send the biggest hugs and kisses to my entire family and all my friends who have helped me get to this HUGE MILESTONE in my life. Without all the support and love I would still be under that rock!!! I cannot wait to see where the step with the new-old Katie goes from here!!! Now…who is ready for that 5K!?!?!?!?!?…………………

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Forever Thoughts

Forever thoughts!

I thought we would end up together, not because of any foreshadowing in my dreams, or a psychic but only cuz of the fact deep in my mind and heart that with you I was happy. With you mentally physically it didn’t matter I felt the joy!

I remember our very first meeting then our first conversations, emails, events. My heart jumps and it felt as if I had been on a rollercoaster dropping 100 floors straight down into a sudden STOP. And stop it did, stop till our lives brought back to that moment only delayed by distance. Distance whether it was miles, feet, hours, weeks, years.. The sudden STOP was felt everywhere and every time. The fact that fate kept allowing for our paths to cross made it impossible to push you out completely. In fact you probably where on my mind then as if the roles were reversed thru it all.

The human beings have a way of remembering things that we don’t think matter or really have no grasp on our lives but with you it was different. I can recall details of our encounters, the emotions kept pushing me to the forever thoughts. My ending was adapting in the ways it could but it was obvious that there were things that couldn’t be forced into something that wasn’t there…its impossible. Love can cross thru almost all obstacles but reality can over take the human heart and will to continue to be the ruler.

These specific forever thoughts have ended. Its now someone else’s forever ending. They get to feel your love, the passion in your heart and soul, Most of all the strength of a partner that will always be felt from you that transcends from the deepest parts of your soul to the open heart. I will miss you but to know that you have gone on and made someone’s forever ending amazing is something that pushes me to find my new cherished ending

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I remember

I remember

I remember the way your hugs felt, each and every time..
I remember the way your leg crossed mine and not wanting to move to make sure it stayed until dawn…
I remember you always wanted to hold my smallest finger in your hand just to know you were there…
I remember the way my heart jumped as you kissed my forehead…
I remember the way you made me look at you and smile when all I wanted to do is breakdown and cry…
I remember you always turning on my favorite song just so I could move my head and hips to the beat…
I remember staying on the phone for hours talking about anything, it didn’t matter what it was about it was the fact that we could hear each others voice was enough..
I remember the distance, distance in time, miles, stages of life just all distances…
I remember the laughter that was made by our smiles, your corners of your mouth turned up so much that it made me want to smile even more. ..
I remember how grateful I felt that I had you to stick up for me in times when I had no strength in me and was afraid…
I remember how time stood still when you were around. When it went from the moon and stars to clear blue sky filled with sun rays…
I remember the way my heart felt when I heard your ringtone coming from my phone no matter the time of day or night…
I remember seeing you everywhere, on faces of strangers, on TV, out dancing.. You were always ever present in my minds eye…

I remember the concern I heard in your voice which replayed over and over in my head…
I remember all of the untruths that were told. One by one was slowly turning into ten by ten and more.
I remember the pain when it was over, again…
I remember the desperation I had for you to try and comprehend what I was going thru ; yet you still didn’t even try to get it and understand…
I remember the betrayal when everything was finally written out clear as day….
I remember being scared, scared that I wont be able to forget, knowing that I will always remember, what I remember. ..

By: Katie
Date: May-2011

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new analogy

So I mentioned this on facebook how I came up with a new analogy for my hips and thought I would put it on here and explain my thoughts. It is kind of random so stick with me and just imagine this picture in your head..

You wake up monday morning, you have to go to work, you get there to find everything a mess, everything is out of reach, your computer wont start, you cant find anything you are looking for, you really are afraid that your computer might have crashed sometime during the night… oh and you just realized your food has grown some funny blue color while in the lunchbox…

You get thru Monday barely and at the end of the day your boss comes in and says not only do you have to work all week, which is not like your schedule that you got, you have to work the entire weekend too!

So you go home and try to relax but you have all the issues of your day at work on your mind. All week you just keep thinking about that pay check that you are gonna get on Friday. Have you heard the saying about “rub the check where it hurts” thats what you keep thinking about it all week, and you wonder if you are going to get time and half for the overtime since you are working ALL weekend…

Well Friday comes around… Saturday comes around… Sunday comes around and no pay check..

Your boss comes in and tells you that you wont be getting any more pay checks till you can come to work and everything goes perfectly for you.. computer works, everything is within your reach, everything is perfect… and you think to yourself “how in the hell am I going to be able to pull that off”…

Wonder if that day will every come!?!? Me too…. I am still waiting for my “PERFECT DAY” because I have been waiting for 11 years…

Someday my PAYCHECK will be here, and I will be able to get up and go to work and have everything will be Perfect!!!

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