I have been procrastinating in posting an update about me and my lovely hips. Honestly it a has been for a few different reasons that at the time sounded for real but now kinda sounds dumb but if you know me I can rationalize anything!! Haha anyways..My other fear is that I will somehow lose all of the progress I have made a be in a so much pain I would regret even mentioning my position or progress. But Katie doesn’t do fear when it comes to my hips. I have been taught thru the years that being cautiously optimistic will make life worth living!!! It has shown me that life is scary, choices are made, outcomes of the unknown, people lost along the way, dreams felt diminished but still..still I push forward.
I met with my doctor yesterday and I was so pumped cuz I was walking in on my own two legs without any aluminum parts assisting me!! I was able to tell him I am almost off all my medication which at on point was over 16 prescription pills in a day. Which looking back is just crazy but it is what I had to do at the time to continue the journey! So back to the doctor, he walked in and asked where are your crutches ? To that question I said the most beautiful five words that have ever come out of my mouth… I said “I don’t need them anymore” I had that feeling in my tummy like when you remember a fond memory, or the feeling people might feel when they realize they just won the lottery. Today I won the lottery. I know what it feels like to leave a doctor’s appointment and want to go hide under a rock because the outlook looks so grim that nothing would make me want to be anyplace else besides by the rock. But today I don’t need the rock, I can smile, my heart can smile.
Back to the doc appt, my doctor was commenting on my progress and said that “I” did all of the work. He said all he did was flip around our views at the time and how I have gained miles and miles of distance from those days. And how for once I was able to try a different method besides surgery and for the first time in a very long time it has worked. I will be the first to admit I do not accept compliments very well AT ALL. I usually end up brushing it off or return a compliment, but today and right now I am trying to take it all in about my journey with these hips. People always refer to me as being strong, courageous, or someone who refuses to give up. For some reason I never believed it. But something clicked in the docs office today when he looked me in the eyes and said you have done the work. Even when it was so very hard and my entire body was yelling at me and starting to shut down there was something in me wanting to say no, and with that no I was able to push back even harder against those two letters… n…o..!
So my encouraging thoughts that I used to tell, well I still tell myself are to live everyday to the fullest and that’s for real! Life can change at the blink of an eye life is hard and can be scary but you have what it takes! And I like to think of myself as a prime example. I have not walked in almost 5 years and within a little less than a year I have pun in the time, effort, and tenacity to get better. As of my most recent physical therapy session I walked for 45 min on the alter G treadmill with a 2% incline, with 95% of my body weight, followed by my other therapy appt for an hour and half of abs, back, leg rehab with treadmill work, weight training, proprioception and just starting more sport specific drills. I have never been so tired and covered in sweat and wanting a full body ice bath but STILL loving every minute of it! I have been extremely diligent with weight watchers and counting my points daily and weekly and if I can steal a saying from Jennifer Hudson, “weight watchers because it works”! Since the end of March I have lost 19.3lbs and I plan for that number to continue to keep going up so my weight can keep going down!
So next time when you feel like you can’t do it or just want to say no, think of me and with a huge enthusiastic tone say YES! And then if you need a pep talk call me and I will have one ready just for you!!!! Lastly, I would like to say the biggest thank you and send the biggest hugs and kisses to my entire family and all my friends who have helped me get to this HUGE MILESTONE in my life. Without all the support and love I would still be under that rock!!! I cannot wait to see where the step with the new-old Katie goes from here!!! Now…who is ready for that 5K!?!?!?!?!?…………………